Case in point; I'm not sure exactly where we were, but at a rest stop there was a whole stand of boxes, one in which the Florida Singles Entertainer was being sold. How could I NOT buy it? It was a long drive, I needed entertaining.
What could I have possibly learned? Oh Lawd! Here goes:
1. The FSE does NOT edit your singles ad. Have someone with an education read your article before sending it in to be published. Then again, this might help in the weeding out process for possible suitors/suitees. i.e: SDWF (Ft. St. Lucie, FL) "People tells me I'm cute, sweet, kind, smart and have a sense of humor, you can be the judge....I am seeking my real soul mate....30-38 of age. He must have a child of his own..."
I'm not sure why she underlined the words "real soul mate" in her ad unless sometime in the past she was lured in to a relationship by a fake soul mate. The fact that "people tells" her about her being cute and smart did not take away from the fact that her perfect man had to bring "a child of his own" to the romantic deal table. Apparently she is unwilling to share, so folks when it comes to the chillins, it is BYOK. Then again her friends didn't "tells" anything about her being unselfish now did they?
2. I noticed that many of the ads ended with these words: "No Inmates" Ya think???!!!!!!! I had no idea that the penal system was a steady source of respondees to the singles ads! Then again, the FSE does carry this heading on their ads page: "Florida Singles ~ Penpals & Singles. I have to believe they are looking for a pen pal being as actual dating could prove difficult when on lockdown.
3. Some of the singles are similar to Jaguars but have no label so I shall call them Saber Tooth Tigresses ("Jaguars - A woman in her 70’s interested in dating or hooking up with younger men") ie: SWWF (Oneonta, NY) "DOB 12-22-26.....looking for a SWM 58 to 80 years old...no bad habits and have a nice car..." Really? NO bad habits? I have to believe by the time someone is 80, they're gonna have a bad habit or two.
4. There were some that I feel truly believed they were going to find love and others who ran on the perverted side, but at least they were upfront about it: "49 Year Old Man seeks one or two women, prefer beauty, large bust and redheads. Call me XXX-XXX-XXXX Stephen" and "Divorced Mexican Man (Dallas, TX) 44, 5'8", slim, childless, blue-collar...broad-minded sexually. Seek uninhibited, broad-minded sexually woman. Any race, age under 5' 5". Very bold advertising for pairs of women. As for the Mexican dude, all wild chicks taller than him need not apply.....
5. The abbreviations used stumped me at times. One of of which took days for us to figure out but we laughed when we realized how simple it was LTR.....Long Term Relationship. I think I shall put out a Singles Ad Abbreviation Guide, be on the lookout for the handy pocket pal for singles : SAAG a handy reference for those looking for love from the comfort of their own home.
Folks, this paper had them all, young, old, short and tall. I admire the specific way in which each went into detail as to what they were looking for and I laughed as I thought how in the end what they were not putting into their ads are what is really the most important for that special someone they are seeking to share their lives with. Love me when I'm unlovable, be honest with me but not cruel, be kind to me as that will solicit a much better response than tit for tat(we all have our bad days), my children are a part of me and are part of the deal, looks fade, but it is important to me for you to attempt to look your best, and above all NO INMATES.
© 2010 Annette Bagley-Martin
